Girl with the Glass Wrists

My heart isn’t so secret when i trace circles on your knees and smile at you, easy. When you...

asandcastleheart — Sun, 19 May 2013 01:36:00 -0700

My heart isn’t so secret

when i trace circles on your knees

and smile at you, easy.

When you stop by my house,

and I end up running errands with you,

I feel like I could run so much more,

everything could happen anywhere else,

but I’d never want to be anywhere else

but here with you,

free heart and free spirit.

I suppose that’s love.

I suppose that I love you

and that’s what scares me,

because I have made a habit

of keeping my heart a secret,

like maybe if i sew thorns into my veins

no one will touch me, but here you are,

hands grasping tight against my rigid walls,

and I don’t think you’re going anywhere.

My heart isn’t so secret when you dance with me

and hold my hand, along with my heart.

I don’t know what’s scarier

the idea that you’ll stay,

or the idea that you’ll leave.

But I have one idea for you and me:

Let’s find out.

Advice for Young Hearts:

asandcastleheart — Sun, 19 May 2013 01:00:00 -0700

You cannot treat people like gods,

there is a reason why the boy with the dark eyes

or the girl with the messy hair

remain unobtainable to you.

They are more than ideas,

they are heartbeats and clammy hands

sleepless nights in cold Novembers

and the scars that may trace their arms

and their hearts.

You cannot treat someone like a celebrity,

but you should celebrate them as people,

not daydreams.

asandcastleheart: They are singed, burned black and empty, Homeless and without flight. Brothers...

asandcastleheart — Thu, 16 May 2013 10:02:15 -0700

asandcastleheart:

They are singed, burned black and empty,

Homeless and without flight.

Brothers and sisters with nowhere to turn

but to each other.

Comforting themselves

with the beating of their hearts

and the echo of one familiar word:

hope,

reminding them of the flutter of wings

and an eight year old’s paradise.

They never knew how to fall

and today they learned.

Finally.

What makes a good poem anyways? Do I have to twist a metaphor through it, like vines through your...

asandcastleheart — Wed, 15 May 2013 11:18:18 -0700

What makes a good poem anyways?

Do I have to twist a metaphor through it,

like vines through your veins,

or grow a simile as ivy

between your toes?

No, I will not tear away my heart

for a small chance at fame.

You will never see me without

a small glass heart and

a fight for strength.

There are some things that

will never change.

Summer To-Do List:

asandcastleheart — Tue, 14 May 2013 02:31:00 -0700

1. Learn how to unwind him

from your veins and very existence.

Do not regret this.

2. Regret this, turn back immediately.

Twist him back in between each heartbeat,

let yourself cry.

3. Teach yourself that it is okay to cry

in public places. You should not be ashamed

of your aching heart.

4. Instead of peeling your layers away

learn how to accept them,

learn how to accept yourself.

5. Take that hot air balloon ride

you’ve always wanted to go on.

6. Go to the Children’s museum

to remember what it is like to be young.

Maybe tell him how you feel there.

Maybe.

7. Trust him not to leave when you do,

because you will, eventually.

8. Make a thousand promises,

break them.

You need to learn that

some promises

are meant to be broken,

but that isn’t bad.

No, it’s just right.

Stop writing all these love poems for him. It only turns your heart inside out and breaks it, and he...

asandcastleheart — Sun, 12 May 2013 21:46:36 -0700

Stop writing all these love poems for him.

It only turns your heart inside out and breaks it,

and he is the leap year in your life,

rare and unreliable, not enough to hold your heart.

Have you ever thought that maybe if you stopped loving them your heart would be free from all that...

asandcastleheart — Sun, 12 May 2013 21:31:00 -0700

Have you ever thought that maybe

if you stopped loving them

your heart would be free

from all that weight, all that pressure

would ease from your veins

and you could escape,

just for a little while.

But just wait, because you could never recreate

the way your heart jumped when they looked at you

or how you could count the freckles

under their eyes or memorize

the small distance between

their front teeth, and you should never

ever wish to let that go

no matter how fast your heart

is sinking.

I don’t know how I can look you in the eyes when all I want to do is look away, because I...

asandcastleheart — Sun, 12 May 2013 02:18:00 -0700

I don’t know how I can look you in the eyes

when all I want to do is look away,

because I cannot handle you

nestled up against me

with your heart pounding against its cage

when I do not have the key.

So please tell me to stay,

because I don’t know how

to put you into words,

but I’d sure like to learn.

Please do not dance with me with the word pretty dancing on your lips, as you pay for us to see my...

asandcastleheart — Sat, 11 May 2013 02:40:00 -0700

Please do not dance with me

with the word pretty dancing on your lips,

as you pay for us to see my favorite book

played on the big screen,

because it will be too much for my heart.

I will collapse in on myself like

Gatsby’s dreams of his future,

pierced by a bullet and an excessive

sense of self sacrifice.

Tell me, is your heart so weak that I have to carry the weight of it with mine? Or is it that you...

asandcastleheart — Thu, 09 May 2013 03:19:00 -0700

Tell me, is your heart so weak

that I have to carry the weight of it with mine?

Or is it that you have grown tired

of picking the weeds from beneath my fingernails

and placed it in a little glass box

for the girl with roses in her cells?

You told me I was perfect once, that I reminded you of the girl who read books, rather than burned...

asandcastleheart — Mon, 06 May 2013 00:49:00 -0700

You told me I was perfect once,

that I reminded you of the girl

who read books, rather than burned them,

yet you can’t help yourself but to

burn me.

And I am still here, turning the pages

to a book that most had abandoned

long ago.

Sometimes I am red, breathing fire from my lungs and love from my veins, but red is burning and I...

asandcastleheart — Mon, 06 May 2013 00:42:46 -0700

Sometimes I am red,

breathing fire from my lungs

and love from my veins,

but red is burning

and I cannot burn forever,

though it feels like I do.

Sometimes I am blue,

and I could drown you

in the cool cavern

of my sorrow,

but I could never

wish that on you.

Most times I am green.

Sturdy and self reliant,

although I would love to rely

on you.

I love you, because there is a war in your bones and yet you are still standing.

asandcastleheart — Sat, 04 May 2013 18:58:00 -0700

I love you,

because there is a war

in your bones

and yet

you are still

standing.

I don’t know where to go, you pushed me out of the cage you spent years trying to keep me...

asandcastleheart — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 01:48:00 -0700

I don’t know where to go,

you pushed me out of the cage

you spent years trying to keep me in.

I am no songbird,

I scratch and bite at the thought of

authority.

I growl and snap when you tell me

what to do, who to be.

I am no a river, flowing in

the direction you meant me to,

but a titan, a fox,

outwitting your every command

and breathing stardust into

the Earth, without boundaries.

You never could hold me into a cage,

but when you pushed me out,

I was lost.

Conflict had become my comrade,

and now it was my home.

It’s hard to believe that a parent

could kick a child out for being ill,

but you were taught that disease spreads

and I was too headstrong to accept those ideals.

I taught myself that disease was to be ashamed of,

so I packed it with my things and left,

until the day, you handed me your heart

and whispered, “breathe”.

Go ahead, kiss other girls and tell them they’re pretty. You only let yourself down in the...

asandcastleheart — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 20:20:46 -0700

Go ahead,

kiss other girls

and tell them they’re pretty.

You only let yourself down in the end.

And I am a ruby red stain

on the back of your hand,

reminding you

reminding you.

I Always Pray For It To Be Over.

asandcastleheart — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 02:34:37 -0700

If I wish away my feelings,

they will turn to ashes,

like a phoenix,

and take flight,

leaving me behind,

awestruck and empty.

A ghost without a past.

He tells me to scream. He says, “Screaming is a way to sell your soul without...

asandcastleheart — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 15:40:27 -0700

He tells me to scream.

He says, “Screaming is a way

to sell your soul without consequence.”

He says, “Crying will heal you.

You just need to do it.”

But it’s two AM, and

I have muffled my heart

with pain pills and blood

and you are pushing against

your rib cage to meet me.

He doesn’t know I have

sold my soul more times than once

and have faced my punishment

years over again with the way

you look at me.

We are sitting and you are silent. It is midnight and we are dodging the comets in our hearts, and...

asandcastleheart — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 23:21:00 -0700

We are sitting and you are silent.

It is midnight and we are dodging

the comets in our hearts,

and you tell me you don’t know

what you’ll do without me.

I could tell you that we

will catch the comets in our mouths

and spit out the stardust,

we don’t need anyone to tell us

how this ends.

I could tell you that you will see me almost every other month

and we will hold hands at your favorite musical.

I will visit the hospital

and you will go to prom alone.

We will skype almost every week,

but you will grow distant,

and learn to cope

without me.

I remember handing you a rose and spinning, spinning with you and your joy, but I did not feel the...

asandcastleheart — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 23:07:00 -0700

I remember handing you a rose

and spinning, spinning with you and your joy,

but I did not feel the thorns, no

not this time.

My heart was seeping through my pores,

but all I can feel is the rose in your hand.

Suddenly I understand,

all the pain in the world

and it only made me kind,

praying to be noticed

after I noticed you first.

Don’t tell me to just set my emotions on fire and let you watch them blaze. I cannot tell you...

asandcastleheart — Mon, 22 Apr 2013 00:07:08 -0700

Don’t tell me to just

set my emotions on fire

and let you watch them

blaze.

I cannot tell you how many times

my heart has been scarred.

I’m not sure you could recognize it

as a heart anymore,

because I have a steady fire

roaring in my rib cage,

and there is constant damage

to my lungs, so I can’t speak without

smoke seeping from the cracks in my lips.

I cannot speak past my scarred heart.